Wednesday, October 16, 2013

Fourth Grade Photo - Swoon!


What a beautiful child! This photo makes me swoon.

Yesterday, I went for a little walk with Wenxin and snapped some photos to commemorate his fourth grade year -- my version of school pics for my homeschooled kids.

Once  again, this adoptive momma had to pause, peek back over her shoulder, and savor the moment. Look how far we've come!

Gone are the days of Wenxin dodging the paparazzi, ducking out of family photos, and daring me to see if I could really get a Christmas card of all of us. 

New adoptive mommas, those first years are hard! But compassionately parenting, with connection as the goal, eventually bears sweet fruit. Looking back, I can even see how learning to parent Wenxin has made me a better parent to all my kids. Parenting with connection isn't just for adopted kids.

This morning I read a beautiful narrative of what parenting with connection looks like in real life. In Walking Through a Re-Do, this momma gives a blow by blow description of how she handled things when her daughter got frustrated during homeschool and threw a book, notebook, and pencil to the floor before fleeing the room in anger.

This momma didn't excuse the behavior. Far from it. But she was mindful of her child's background, and responded with compassion, keeping connection as her goal while correcting the behavior. The results were beautiful.

My parenting is far from perfect, and I blow it more times than I'd like to admit. But this is what I'm aiming for. I hope you enjoy, Walking Through a Re-do, as much as I did.

Sharing today at The Long Road to China and WFMW.

Ni Hao Yall

Monday, October 7, 2013

Little Touches of Fall or "Faking Fall"



I live in a place where the seasons don't noticeably change. . . where a 75 degree day means there's nip in the air. . . where people sweat and wear flip flops all year long.

The palm trees in front of my house don't change with the seasons. And the lone maple tree in my backyard gets the news really late, dropping scarlet leaves to the ground sometime around February.

But I come from a place where fall means bursts of color, falling leaves and sweater weather. Shorts and flip flops packed away til spring. First frost.

I miss a real Fall.

I've been following Nester's 31 day series, Home. Uncomplified. So when I saw these cute little white pumpkins at the grocery store, I knew I'd found a simple way to introduce a little Fall into our home.

I also pulled out my gorgeous brass candlesticks because their warm glow seems a bit Fallish to me

No sweaters or frost here. But we have pumpkins!

Besides Nester's series, I want to share a couple of posts I love from a new blog I've started following. Remember when I wrote about Wenxin referring to his birth mother as his real mom? If you missed that one, you should go back and read it -- especially the comments. I love it when this blog becomes a respectful conversation. A safe place to share different viewpoints. That particular post drew comments from adoptive moms at all stages of life, along with some adult adoptees, and even a birth mom.

One of the commenters introduced me to the blog, Five is a Lot of Kids, and Beth's post On Being Made Real. Best thing I've ever read on the subject.

And while I was visiting her blog, I couldn't help but notice how hilarious Beth is. Start your Monday off right by reading her post, So Your Bathroom Smells Like Pee.

Linking up today at Ni Hao Y'all, The Long Road to China, and Little by Little.